Often times, even if we feel we are in the right, others would expect us to feel guilty about something. Strange isn’t it? We would have just acted as we normally would and they would say, “come on, don’t you think that’s wrong?”. Either that, or a stare that speaks volumes. Well, I say don’t give a damn to what they think. Who is to say what they think is right?
So here are a few situations I could think of where others would expect us to feel guilty about something..but we shouldn’t really care..! Do you feel the same way?
1. Speaking whats in our mind
Its weird when others ask our honest opinion, and when we say it, they seem to think we were really frank and expect us to feel guilty about it. “Oh how can you say that? Isn’t that rude? I can’t think of saying something like that!”. Please. When you ask me for an honest opinion, I can’t sugar-coat it and give it, so take it or leave it. Just don’t expect me to feel guilty about it.
2. Doing something fun alone
“You watched THAT movie? Without ME? How I longed to watch that with you! Hmm”. Everyone needs a lone time for themselves. More so when you are a couple. So if you want to take a break for some time, go to the mall alone or spend a day with your friends, go ahead have fun without thinking twice about it.
3. Pampering yourself
Its your money, so you can buy anything you want with it. But remember, some people would express their jealousy with a tricky guilt-inducing question- “That is SUCH an expensive overcoat! Don’t you feel guilty to be spending soo much money on one coat? I could have bought three dresses with that amount!”. YOU would have. But I am not you. We know what we are spending and where to cut back. So back off, please!
4. Not knowing Hindi
I am a south Indian. I speak Tamil. Not Hindi. Why is it so hard for you understand that? Its a simple statement. But no.. every time this topic comes, we are raised the question “You don’t know Hindi?!! What, really?! How come? You SHOULD learn Hindi!” Oh I “should” is it? Tell me more, why “should” I? And while you are at it, Hindi is not a national language of India. You don’t know Tamil, so why do keep asking us the same question? Leave us alone.
5. Wearing an outfit you love
Many a times, people wear outfits to please their boyfriends, husbands or family members. Life comes at you fast, so if you like a cute, short dress, wear it now! Don’t care about what others say. If you think its your style, then go ahead, don’t let others make you feel guilty.
6. Eating your heart out in front of others
Yes, I love chicken 65 and will finish up the last piece if no one cares for it. So even if I look like a pig, I am sure I will be a pretty one ๐
7. Going to a 5-star restaurant
My family, whenever I go to India, take us out to 5-star restaurant at least once. Reason being simple, they wouldn’t go if I wasn’t present and they would like to splurge on me at least once before I head back to US. So what’s the harm in this? Don’t you dare try to make us feel guilty by stating that for the amount we spend there we can donate to charities or go to normal restaurant 5 times. We have done both of those you have mentioned, so back off again, no guilt thank you very much.
8. “Spoiling” kids
New parents are always faced with this question. When do we put our kid in playschool? Each child is different, so every parent have to be different. What works for one cannot and will not work for another. So every time some one asks, “Is he not in preschool yet? You are spoiling him by not putting him in school early! I put my kid in preschool wayyyy earlier” – all that you should say is “I know my kid. Thank you for your concern”.
This is just my list. If you can think of anything where others expect us to feel guilty but we shouldn’t give a damn, let me know! I will add to the list. So go on, let’s be free like the bird and not worry too much ๐
Haa haa, loved reading it Padhma! Now, that’s the pleasure of having a blog isnt it? Your blog, your rules ๐
Very true Gai ๐ And I didn’t know you were a blogger until now! And an avid reader too I see! Let me see if I can find myself a good read from your reviews, see you there ๐
Its a nice read Padhma! I so agree on the first point.. Ppl ask for opinion and when we are honest, they think it was rude.. I wonder why they ask for opinion/suggestion when they don’t have that maturity to take/consider it in good spirits.. I’ll be at the verge of screaming “If you want my honest opinion then ask for one not when you want to hear what you want to hear”..
Love “if I look like a pig, I am sure I will be a pretty one”.. he he.. I’m sure!
Its a nice read Padhma! I so agree on the first point.. Ppl ask for opinion and when we are honest, they think it was rude.. I wonder why they ask for opinion/suggestion when they donโt have that maturity to take/consider it in good spirits.. Iโll be at the verge of screaming โIf you want my honest opinion then ask for one not when you want to hear what you want to hearโ..
Love โif I look like a pig, I am sure I will be a pretty oneโ.. he he.. Iโm sure!
Looks like i need to put in details everytime i comment since i don’t have a blog..
Thanks Rashmi. And yeah, not everyone wants to listen with an open mind. They ask questions, and only expect answers that they want to hear ๐